HOT TAKES

POLITICS

"Trump did one thing right: teaching me what not to do in economics. Like how to sleep when in negotiations with foreign countries. Perfect for establishing dominance."

- Anonymous

"Trump wants to use your taxpayers' money to throw himself the biggest party ever- at least we know the guest list won't be inviting Luigi (unfortunately)."

Anonymous

"There's a never-ending number of people Keir Starmer appealed to. I wouldn't be so happy knowing the right wing is praising your immigrant views. Reeks of desperation..."

Anonymous

"Max La Manna and Maya have been striking with hunger to get UCLA to divest from Israel...I guess they don't care about student health when it comes to speaking out."

Anonymous

NEWS

"RFK whipped his head so fast when he was in Congress, when Ben & Jerry's founder Ben Cohen protested about Gaza, you'd think the Kennedy curse caught up to him."

- Anonymous.

"Students are living below the poverty line, and the UK government wants to crack down on them further for 'fraud'. Hey Labour- why don't you ask Keir Starmer about his views on it....maybe this time he won't change his answer 👀"

Anonymous

"Popmart is the new indicator of the recession. The devilish-looking dolls are making bank, but the market is older than the target market. Which is weird since the recession means no individuality allowed- are we fighting the economy, one labubu at a time?"

Anonymous

"Eurovision is approaching, one certain country will definitely be booed. "

Annonymous

CELEBRITY

"Diddy pleaded the judge to speed up the court date, but when the judge accepted he backtracked. Has this got anything to do with the key witness, Cassie, being 8 1/2 months pregnant when he asked to extend the date to 2 months later..." 

- Anonymous

"It's hot girl summer! Except when I snort c**e it's a problem, but when influencers like Alex Erle and celebrities like Charli XCX do it, it's brat. The new vinyl is out, get your free sample now!"

Anonymous

"Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds, just how far can you fall. And let's count who they're bringing down with them, the latest is Taylor Swift. Caeful, she might just shake you off and you'll be left to buy drugstore hair products, being problematic is costly."

Anonymous

"Michael B Jordan, you spent so long getting into our hearts, just don't try so hard to get into the after party of Diddy Comes. After all, the video of you trying to get into the party doesn't look too good with the horrific things we're hearing in the trial. You were rejected entry for now, I hope nothing incriminating is discovered..."

Annonymous

CLIMATE

"SeaCURE can apparently pull our CO2 out of the ocean, by chemically altering water to take out the CO2 to take in more CO2, let's ask the animals if they want to take part...oh wait, they don't have feelings. Let's do it!"

- Anonymous

"They wonder why Gen Z doesn't care about their future...when the pandemic showed how people should live, they jumped back on the hamster wheel when it finished. If the governments of the world can show they can change, it must be the fault of the youth for not being enough to change."

Anonymous

"When the colonising countries want money, they burn the world, and tell their lesser; if they want to be the same, they should follow. But when the countries battle political unrest and get their foot in the door, the western powers want green peace. Seems a little hypocritical to me."

Anonymous

"The UK is funding £800 million into dimming the sun. Spraying the air with toxic aerosols, but who cares when the rich can fly up and away to better climates."

Anonymous